Blue Eyed Sun

Blue Eyed Sun - gorgeous greetings cards

Eight ways to deal with failure

#FailureIn my recent column for Progressive Greetings I discussed failure and took a long hard look at how our wedding stationery business, Ivy Ellen, had failed to meet our goals after six years of hard work. I have had lots of lovely comments from readers about it, so to compliment it I thought I'd share some useful thoughts on dealing with failure... 

Sometimes people moan about not being where they want to be in life. Perhaps they don't have enough money, time or  attention from their loved ones. Often they haven't set themselves goals that they have made a plan for, focused on and worked hard towards achieving. They also don't take a good look at themselves, their services or products and work hard on being better for others. These do not count as failures in my book. To properly fail you have to have a goal, make a plan and work hard to execute it well. When reality doesn't tally well with your plan - you've failed.

When that happens, here are eight ways to deal with failure:

1. See it for what it is

It's important that you don't see the situation as being any worse or better than it actually is. If you set yourself a target and you haven't reached it then it's good to know how far off you are. Are you 10% out, 20% or worse. If it's bad, how bad is it exactly? What are the pluses, what are the minuses and what's interesting about the situation you are now in?

2. Did you stick to your plan?

To reach our goals we have to have a plan. If you are climbing a mountain it's best to plan the kit you'll need, the route you'll take and training required to prepare for the task ahead. It's important to know if you didn't stick to this plan because sometimes it can be as simple as returning to the path that you may have strayed from and continuing on.

3. How did reality differ from your plan?

When we embark on our goals the landscape that we cover can be different from the maps we consulted and the plan we put in place. Think of all of those who started businesses just before the recession for instance. If you have stuck to your plan and things haven't transpired as expected it's important to recognise the new terrain that you now find yourself on and identify it before continuing. You may need a new plan and sometimes new goals.

4. Consider your options

If your plan didn't fit the reality of the situation, or if the plan simply didn't work, what are your options? You can stop, change direction or keep going. Once you have considered your options it is best to make a decision and take action. If you struggle with deciding you might find the six thinking hats technique useful.

5. If you stop

When you admit defeat and decide not to proceed further try not to waste time and energy beating yourself up about it. It can be tough to deal with, especially when you have put a lot of time, effort and money into reaching your goal. Take a break. Then set yourself a simple achieavable goal to get back on the horse. List out your other ideas and choose one to get going again.

6. If you keep going

Set yourself a time period and keep your budget under control. If you have racked up debts try to avoid making the situation any worse. Don't be the gambler that keeps rolling dice for higher stakes in the deluded belief that things will work out. Get small again and set review dates six and twelve months on to check if you should still keep on going.

7. Changing Direction

I always find it useful to go back to basics and solicit as much criticism of the business and products from customers and friends as possible. This will help with the direction you decide to change towards. There are lots of businesses that started out as a change of direction from an earlier mistake. Look out for signs of potential amongst the wreckage of your failure.

8. Count your blessings

When I fail at something I always find it helpful to remember the things outside my goal that bring joy to my life. I might have failed, but I still have my family and my health for example. There will always be a silver lining in every cloud, so don't forget to notice it. It helps to have interests outside off work to take your mind of things and rebalance.

Sometimes when you pick yourself up, dust yourself off and look around you you'll notice other doors and opportunities present themselves. Take a moment after you are done, be mindful of these and be open to seeing them. Lick your wounds if you must, but don't spend so much time doing so that you keep them open. Let them heal and move on to bigger and better things.

As for us... Ivy Ellen hasn't closed for business, nor has it gone bust. It continues to service customers well and has a beautiful selection of wedding stationery available to order online. We have stopped investing for growth and are focused on staying profitible at the size that it's at (which is respectable by many peoples' standards).

Six ways our minds often deceive us

How to get things done when you don't feel like it

How to declutter your home and business for good